Be clear on your boundaries so others are clear on your boundaries. You will accept yourself and be clear on who you are if you know what your boundaries are. This will give you a strong sense of yourself and you will become more centred, which in turn will mean you will attract more centred people to your life instead of people who are lacking self worth and have no boundaries of their own. If you lack or do not communicate clearly, your boundaries, you can become resentful

Living to certain standards and expectations is another achievement that you should strive for. Standards are how you live your values, which we talked about previously. They are an internal standard for yourself. Committing to living to your standards will allow you to be in alignment with living your values. Your commitments you make to yourself are so important because if you cannot commit to yourself how do you commit to others in a beneficial and loving way. Our standard

How do you reward yourself for your achievements? There are two types of validation or rewards we crave, internal and external. Often when we are looking for validation it is external. We look to our bosses for confirmation of the type of job we are doing, compliments from our friends and family, appreciation from those in the community, the amount of money we earn, a prize, a medal, recognition of service. However, these are not the rewards for achievement that gives us eter

An unattainable goal that we reach for is to be externally beautiful. We are all unique and beautiful in our own way. The media and society have taught us that we should physically look a certain way to succeed in life and many women hold themselves to this and beat themselves up, have self-loathing for themselves all because they do not look a certain way. Who says that being beautiful physically makes us happier? Internally feeling beautiful is what matters. To feel comfort

I became confident in my abilities as I had self–belief, belief I was worthy to put myself out there. I value the person who I am, so I am assured of my ability to make great decisions and take responsibility for my actions. “Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re right.” – Henry Ford I love this quote. For so long I thought I couldn’t, so I didn’t. When I decided that I can if I choose to, I became more confident in myself, I was more willing to tak

To be a giver of significance is doing something without expecting a reward or attention. This will give you happiness, balance and strength in knowing who you are. Do volunteer work, speak up with what you stand for and be loyal to yourself. To be a getter of significance can be unresourceful, it can be playing a martyr, being a victim or creating drama, just so you get attention. It is doing something so that you are acknowledged for it without the genuine reasons behind it

What achievements give you confidence and validation? Did you get praise for your athleticism, intellectualism or academic results? Or did you get praise for how you looked, behaved or played? Or no praise at all? Validation of your achievements is one of the core needs of humans to live a fulfilling life. It is the need to feel significant. We all want to have that feeling of being important, being recognised or being worthy. Unfortunately, many of us are starved of this nee

When you do become assertive, you gain self-confidence and self-esteem. You improve your communication and build honest and true relationships. One of my mentors gave me great advice. She said stand for something, stop being beige and stand for something. Being a people pleaser, this was quite confronting as I was used to going along with what everyone else wanted and therefore was living an invisible life. Once I started standing up, in a respectful way, for what I believe i

Often the simple things that we enjoyed as children or teenagers are what lights us up, gives us confidence and lets us have lots of fun. When this concept of finding your inner child was mentioned to me, I was unsure of what I could learn from it. I went back to my childhood and focused on what I found fun back then. I brought back the pleasurable, the curiosity, the lightness, the flow and the adventure to my life that was missing. By listening and seeing what the little gi

What lights you up? What lit you up as a child/teenager? When we turn 40 it should be seen as the beginning of our peak, not the start of the end. In my view, it is the wise woman coming to the fore and the place to begin from where you can blossom into who you truly are. As a woman, if we embody a life of compassion, vision and strength we are living with power where we are fully conscious and centred. We can follow our calling and know our true purpose. I love the metaphor

Your mood will automatically boost because you have more energy, time and patience if you only concentrate on the things you can control or influence. A way to boost yourself is to boost yourself spiritually. When you understand, what spirituality is to you then you can recognise how your growth as a person pertains to you. You can appreciate the flow of energy through you. You can deepen your spiritual health. Often, we will understand how to boost ourselves physically or ev

A way to boost your emotional state in a positive way is to know what is in your control and what is not. We call this the Locus of Control. Locus of Control is a concept that refers to how strongly people believe they have control over the situations and experiences that affect their lives. I believe to focus on what you can control (which is ourselves) and what we could potentially influence (which is others) we eliminate wasting time, money and effort on things that we hav

Do you know how to boost yourself? How do you boost yourself up when times are tough? Women often use unresourceful, unsustainable and external ways to boost themselves when times are not going how they anticipated. Some women are addicted to food, some women are addicted to alcohol, some women are addicted to shopping. They are boosting themselves in these artificial ways and that are not really sustainable. They get a big high then the big low is back again. The key is to b

Look at the segments of your life and you will find there are 8 general areas: Relationships; Spirit/Soul; Fun & Recreation; Health; Money; Personal Growth; Physical Environment; Business/Career. Consider if you are living to your values in each of these areas. If you are not then you need to take steps to start taking back your power in each segment by taking responsibility to control your life and gain the momentum to move forward. “Life is like riding a bicycle, in order t

Do you know what is important to you? How do you live what is important to you? For us to achieve long-term happiness, balance, stability and to stay on course is to live by our highest ideals. When you know what is important to you it can make life easier, more in flow, grounded and you can handle what the world throws at you. Instead of living in a reactive world where you are hoping, wishing, waiting, dreaming, you can be proactive about how to live your life by knowing wh

When it comes to creative blockages it is about our negative or limiting beliefs and our fears. If you are creatively blocked it is because you feel safer that way, you may not be happy but at least you know where you are. You have a fear of the unknown so when this fear is crippling, you will stay stuck or blocked so you do not have to address the unknown. This stifles our creative urges. When we are young we are creative, we are children so being creative is how we explore

Beliefs can really limit and trap you into redundant thinking and can keep you stuck where you only see a world of restriction. Every moment we have millions of pieces of information coming at us. We manage to process about 7 chunks of this information. Our conscious minds could not conceivably take in all the information that is going on around us. We would be in continual overload if we had to pay constant attention to everything all the time. An example is that right now y

What is keeping you trapped? Are you trapped in your mind, your body, your soul, your circumstances, your environment or in your emotions? Why do we behave a certain way to keep ourselves trapped? Knowing the reason behind our behaviour is essential to be able to break free from the feeling of being trapped, to living Groundhog Day over and over so we become more composed and self assured as we navigate the life we are living. No one really knows why someone behaves a certain

How do you know that? Do you take action even when the butterflies in your stomach start fluttering or do you let fear dictate what you do or don’t do? Do you find it difficult to step out of your comfort zone? To be part of Adventure School you must be willing to be brave, to live on the edge of your comfort zone for a while until this lifestyle of balance becomes ‘normal’. To be on the edge of your comfort zone is to be at the conscious limit of your thinking – the boundary

Whether you are new to a world of living with balance, being grounded and centred, having a beautiful life or want to experience more adventures, I welcome you to read, interact and implement something from this book. You will hear my story soon of how I had become stuck, sad, wanting to give up on life and how I was able to move through this to now be living as a radiant woman who has unleashed her magnificence and has many exciting adventures. You will be given an Adventure